For the first 19 or so years of my life, I was angry.

I was self-sabotaging, I never made any progress and it resulted in me being unhappy and lost.

This story isn’t new.

This is the story of the majority of young men in today’s world.

They feel lost, abandoned, and angry.

Unfortunately, most never change. They just learn how to hide it or manage it as they get older, but inside they’re still that frustrated and confused teenager.

And it’s because they’re missing 4 things - or a combination of them.

In fact, most men never find them - hence why they have to learn how to hide their frustration - but that’s because most men never look for them.

These 4 things aren’t easy to find and they sure aren’t easy to keep.

But that’s how you know they’re valuable.

That they’re essential.

Without them, a man will lash out (often internally, often externally) and spiral downhill.

Potentially very slowly or stay stuck in the same place - dead-end corporate jobs as an example. Enough to get by, but never enough to fix themselves.

And it’s not their fault.

Nobody has ever told them they need these things, in fact, society is almost demonising them.

Making you believe these are bad.

Want proof they’re not?

Look around you. Look at the average man, they lack these 4 things, do they look happy? Fulfilled?

No.

Then look at the men you aspire to be like, even from your youth, James Bond, Superman, or your modern-day idols, they have these 4 things.

When you lack these things, you start to ask “Am I man enough?” - and you mightn’t realise it, but this is the question being asked and everything you do is in response to this.

I’m not saying it’s the only question or driver.

I’m not saying it’s the main question.

But it’s there.

The desire to prove you’re man enough to bring food back to the tribe, that you can provide, that you can survive and win.

These 4 things are foundational for every man to feel, perform, and be at his best.

That’s not to say they’re the only things, but they’re crucial.

For a fulfilling life, every man needs:

• A big fucking goal to focus on

• A mission to dedicate himself to

• The willingness to learn and improve

• The ability to push himself beyond what he thinks possible

The Modern Man

As we’ve already covered, the modern man, on average, lacks these 4 things or at least some combination.

Look at every man you know who is depressed, anxious, and lives in a downward spiral of self-sabotaging habits.

Maybe they hide it well and it’ll take you time to think of them.

Maybe they don’t hide it and you can think of them immediately.

Or maybe you should look in the mirror.

Everyman who is in this state, which nowadays seems average, lacks a big fucking goal, a mission, the willingness to learn and improve, and the ability to push themselves beyond what they think possible.

Or at the very least, they lack a combination.

Now that I’ve highlighted these 4 areas, you’ll be able to look around at those who you don’t want to be like and those who you aspire to be, and you’ll notice the difference.

Those who succeed, are happy and fulfilled, have the 4 areas nailed.

Those who don’t, don’t.

If you’re in a spiral downward or your life is stagnant and you know you’re destined for more, solve this problem.

Set a goal.

Pursue your mission

Learn and improve

Push yourself to be your best.

You’ll change your life. You’ll feel proud and every area of your life will do a 180, and start to hockey stick upward.

You’ll feel fulfilled.

Building A Fulfilling Life

This process isn’t easy.

It can be hard to know what steps to follow and what path to take.

So start here, start with these 4 steps:

1. Set a goal

Your goal needs to meet 4 criteria;

• Reasonably unreasonable

• Specific

• With a deadline

• Linked to your mission and your Utopia.

Your Utopia is your dream life. If you don’t know it, create it.

Write about every area of your life and your dream version of it.

If you achieve your goal, it should push you closer to this dream life and achieving your mission.

If it doesn’t, and if it doesn’t meet the other criteria, you need to change it until it does.

2. Discover your mission

Obviously, for your goal to push you towards your mission, you need to know your mission.

I go into my mission discovery process in a previous newsletter, check it out here

This isn’t an overnight process, but it works.

3. Learn from your mistakes and follow your curiosities

Every man needs to be able to learn and improve.

But it’s easy to get stuck at “What the fuck do I learn?”

Follow your curiosities - what interests you, what lights you on fire?

If you’re not sure, just choose anything remotely interesting and learn about it, follow it and follow the rabbit hole. Follow where your interests take you.

Trust yourself and you will find your interests and passions.

And also learn from your mistakes.

What mistakes have you made? What mistakes are you making? Learn from them.

How could you prevent them? What would you do differently? What worked? What didn’t? Why?

4. Push yourself daily

Pushing yourself to your limits can be tough - in fact it is. It doesn’t get easier.

To start, follow the first 3 steps, it should help with getting you started and making it that bit easier.

But in the mean time, start doing hard stuff daily.

Start working out. Start running. Ice baths. Saunas. Deep focused work.

Every single day, do something you don’t want to do.

However, start small and build over time, build discipline and chase Self-Mastery.

Don’t decide to run 100 miles at 4am on your first day.

Instead, say I’m going to get up 1 hour earlier and head to the gym for 45 minutes.

Or take a cold shower for 30 seconds.

Start small and build. This is a long game you’re playing

Build these 4 areas. You’ll change your life.

- Ross

When you’re ready, here’s how I can help you

• Achieve Self-Mastery, unlock your true potential and smash every goal you set with MasteryOS

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